I am tired. Deep down, bone rattling tired. The kind of tired where the roots of my hair hurt and my judgment is questionable. It's not the new-born-six-feedings-a-night-tired (let's be real here, there is nothing that quite compares to that) but it's that peculiar mama-tired that I have never experienced before having children.

I do things when I hit a certain level of mama-tired that indicate that measures need to be taken to restore me to a normal level of functioning. Like a bath by myself or pillow to myself all night long (perhaps a glass of wine{if I drank}).  What I really mean here, a full weekend of uninterrupted sleep.

Are you mama-tired? Pay close attention to the my signs.

1. I see my son's sneakers on the floor, and wonder if I could possibly have taken him to school without shoes.

2. I forget my telephone number regularly and I have lived in my house for almost 10 years.

3. I have to pause when the hostess at a restaurant asks for my name.

4. My social skills have declined to the point where I commit the unforgivable sin of asking a woman how far along she is before I have confirmed that she is actually pregnant.

5. I let my children play "Jump off of the Couch and Land on Mama," just so I can lie down for five minutes.

6. I can't for the life of me understand the Jerry Springer show theme of the day  "Your Twin Might be Your Father." Um, how does that even happen? Not that I would ever watch Jerry Springer.

7. I forgot to pick up my son from school and drive there in a panic only to realize as I pulled in that he was at chess club. Ding Dong!

8. I find my keys in the door often and can't blame the kids because they are at school or the keys were in my pocket all along!

9. I find yourself on the verge of tears when my local target is out of my favorite brownies. I swear they put crack in that double fudge chuck chocolate brownie or else I'm just oddly addicted to chocolate and chocolate chips in combination (isn't everyone??)

10. I walk into rooms with a distinct purpose and then immediately think "what am I doing in here?"

11. I occasionally regularly send my children to school with no lunch or money to purchase hot lunch. I seriously do not ever want to meet the lunch lady. I know she hates me.

12. I remember that I forgot to eat all day when I get light headed and almost pass out right before dinner!

*Sadly, I didn't make any of these up and I could go on and on! Feel free to add your own!